If You Really Knew Me...
Scripture: Psalm 139
Series: Summer in the Psalms
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Have you ever had someone in your life keep asking, ‘Do you love me?’ Even after years of proving it, they still want to hear it again. Married couples know this — sometimes a spouse will say, ‘I know you care for me, but do you really love me?’ It reminds me of that scene in Fiddler on the Roof, when Tevye asks his wife after 25 years of marriage, ‘Do you love me?’ And she’s baffled: ‘For 25 years I’ve washed your clothes, cooked your meals, shared your bed, raised your children — if that’s not love, what is?’ It’s funny, but it’s also very human. Even when love is proven, we still want reassurance.
We do the same with God. He has shown His love, but when we feel His gaze, we wonder: ‘If You really know me this completely, will You still love me?’ That’s the tension Psalm 139 is wrestling with. And we are going to go on this journey together through the text as we move from exposure to fear to comfort to surrender.
Exposed by His Knowledge (1-6)
The psalm starts off maybe on a pleasant note. But you keep reading and you get the sense that maybe David isn’t comfortable with what God knows about him. The psalm hammers again and again on the point that God knows him. Like really knows him. You have examined me you know everything about me. You know when I sit down, you know my thoughts, you see when I travel, you know what I’m going to say before I say it. And then in verse 5 it says You go before me and follow me. You place your hand of blessing on my head. This is one way to interpret the original text but if you look at other English translations, most will say something like “you hem me in.” Which might not be a good thing. There’s tension and ambivalence towards God. And then in conclusion v 6 says Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too great for me to understand. It’s overwhelming to know that God knows all of you. And not necessarily in a good way. I mean lets try to think of some of the things that we would rather keep hidden. Your browser history, a text thread about a co-worker, your fears about aging, parenting mistakes, for you gen z’s, your second account, those anxious voices in your head, your TikTok likes or the things you scroll through to fall asleep. God knows all of it! What do you think God doesn’t know about you? What do you think you can just gloss over before him? Some of you might need to just start confessing to God right now that you’ve been thinking you can hide some of your life from him, that he doesn’t have access to parts of your life – the things said and done behind closed doors and locked screens. He knows family. And why is that a problem for us? Well because we’ve learned that being known doesn’t always feel safe. We all long to be known and loved. But we all fear being truly known, because what if that love is taken away? If I can barely accept me, how could anyone else? Think of a child blurting something honest and getting laughed at — experiences like that teach us to hide. The fear of being known isn’t irrational. It’s learned, through sin and through wounds.
And so, we run. We hide. We stuff our heads in the sand thinking I just need to forget that God knows this about me and then I can just go on with my life. But we can’t hide from him. We try, but we can’t.
Chased by His Presence (7-12)
And that’s where the second part of the psalm comes in. David actually tries to run. I go up, you’re there. I go down, youre there. I go east, I go west, I go to the oceans, I go to the mountains, I turn off the lights, it doesn’t matter. God is there, present with us. It’s almost like those horror films where the person is running away from the bad guy, goes into the a room and locks the door only to find that the bad guy was in the room with her already!
And it’s striking, isn’t it, how easily we picture that kind of presence when it comes to evil? Just look at the movies that are out there — there’s a whole industry built on stories of demonic possession, hauntings, spirits invading your home. In K Pop Demon Hunter, there are even hints of some good higher power when the women’s voices overpower the demons, but notice — the demons get the spotlight, the good power is vague, unnamed, unexplained. Our culture is quick to believe in the presence of darkness, but slow to believe in the presence of a God who knows our every thought, who shows up in every place, behind every closed door. Yet unlike the demons, this God doesn’t come to destroy. He comes to love us, choose us, fight for us.
“So when you feel like running — ask yourself, what story are you believing? The horror story that says a presence you can’t escape is always bad news? Or the psalm’s story — that God’s presence means He is for you, not against you?
The God who surrounds us is not a stalker, not a monster in the room. He is the One who knit us together in the womb. In other words, the same God whose presence you can’t escape is the God whose presence made you in the first place. That changes everything.”
Formed by His Hands (13-18)
Verse 13 transitions us to this point. You made me. You crafted me. You wove me together. You knitted me in my mother’s womb the text says. He is the craftsman and you are his masterpiece.
Illustration: Melissa M and Melissa S are our knitters. You might not know that about Melissa M but you know Melissa S knits because she’ll bring it to church and be knitting back there to help her stay focused while I’m preaching. And I bet if you asked either of them about the things they have knitted, they can tell you all about the pattern, about the times they missed a stitch and had to go back, undo all that work and make it right. They know the things they’ve made and they care about it.
If we can get that about a scarf or a hat — that the maker knows and cares for what they’ve made — surely we can start to get that about God. He doesn’t just notice you from afar, He crafted you with His own hands. And if He made you with such care, then His knowledge of you is not meant to crush you but to care for you.
And that means something for us. Some of you carry shame about who you are — you feel like a mistake, or you beat yourself up over your body, or you define your worth by what others say. But Psalm 139 says God Himself wove you together. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. The craftsman takes pride in His handiwork. So you don’t need to hide in shame. You can begin to see yourself the way God does.
That’s good news — but the psalm isn’t finished yet. There’s still one more step: if this God knows me so fully and surrounds me so completely, will I open myself up to Him, or will I resist Him? That’s where David goes next.
Surrendered to His Leading (19-24)
It might seem like a verse 19 comes out of nowhere, but it’s actually not. It says, “O God, if only you would destroy the wicked. And goes on to say I hate the wicked. Your enemies are my enemies.” What he’s helping us realize now is that there is a side to choose when it comes to God. If he knows me, if he is with me, if he made me, then am I going to surrender to him, or will I be his enemy. He is for me, but will I be for him, or against him? Will I want what only he wants? Will I choose his will over my own? Just like we can think there are parts of us we can hide from God, we can think that we can have one foot on both sides of the line when it comes to following God. I like what he has to say about mercy and justice but not about generosity. I like what he says about loving our neighbor but not what I’m supposed to do with my love life. That’s not how this works. You know all of me, you are always with me, you formed me, so let all of me be yours.
That’s where this psalm ultimately leads us. Rather than being terrified of God, rather than running from him, we open ourselves up. Search me and know my heart, test me and know my thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you. Have your way Lord. I surrender into the hands of the maker, the craftsman who is still at work in me.
You see the craftsman is not only the one who made you in your mother’s womb. But he is also saw what sin and death was doing to you. He saw how it would lead you to ruin. And rather than casting aside his creation and starting over, he said I will pay the highest cost so that I can redeem it. So he sent his Son, Jesus Christ, into the world. And on the cross, he was exposed, stripped not just of his clothes, but his friends, and his Heavenly Father, he was hemmed in by the wrath of God’s judgment, and took it upon himself to free us of sin and death, if we surrender to him. So in Christ, even more than what David was able to see, we see God as our Maker and Redeemer. The one who would go to such lengths to make us know that in him we are fully known and fully loved.
So will you surrender yourself to him family? Once more, will you resolve yourself to surrender all of you to Christ? Will you let him convict you of sin? Will you let him tell you through his Word, through His people, through his Church that you need to make some changes in your life? That you’ll stop sleeping with someone who isn’t your spouse. That you’ll be loose with your wallets and not with your belts. That you’ll seek to love your neighbor – yeah even that annoying, difficult neighbor – as yourself. That you’ll stop numbing your pain with another binge of scrolling and start bringing your anxieties to Him. That you’ll let go of the bitterness you’ve held for years and finally forgive. That you’ll show up faithfully to worship, serve when no one notices, and live as though your whole life belongs to Him. Because it does.”
So family, we’ve gone on a journey together. We felt the fear of being exposed, we ran away with David, but found that God is no monster but a loving Creator who has redeemed us in Christ and is inviting us to surrender ourselves to him. So let us stop with the hiding. Stop running. And open yourself up to him. And let us pray as David did: Search me, O God, and know my heart, and lead me along the path of everlasting life.” May this be true of us in Christ.